shawn carter was born december 4th
weighing in at ten pounds eight ounces
he was the last of my four children
the only one who didnt give me any pain when i gave birth to
him
and thats how i knew that he was a special child
hi baby whats wrong you look like youve lost your best
friend
tell me is it something that ive done again
you look like youve lost your best friend
tell me
they say they never really miss you til you dead or you gone
so on that note im leavin after this song
see you aint gotta feel no way about jay so long
at least let me tell you why im this way hold on
i was conceived by gloria carter and adnus reeves
who made love under the sycamore tree
which makes me a more sicker mc and my momma would claim
at ten pounds when i was born i didnt give her no pain
although through the years i gave her her fair share
i gave her her first real scare i made up for birth when i got
here
she knows my purpose wasnt i aint perfect i care
but i feel worthless cause my shirts wasnt matchin my gear
now im just scratchin the surface cause whats buried under
there
was a kid torn apart once his pop disappeared
i went to school got good grades could behave when i wanted
but i had demons deep inside that would raise when confronted
hold on
shawn was a very shy child growing up
he was into sports and a funny story is
at four he taught himself how to ride a bike
a twowheel at that isnt that special
but i noticed a change in him when me and my husband broke
up
now all the teachers couldnt reach me and my momma couldnt
beat me
hard enough to match the pain of my pop not seein me so
with that disdain in my membrane
got on my pimp game fk the world my defense came
then the haven introduced me to the game
spanish jose introduced me to caine im a hustler now
my gear is in and im in the incrowd
and all the wavy lightskinned girls is lovin me now
my selfesteem went through the roof man i got my swag
got a vocal from this girl when her man got bagged
plus i hit my momma with cash from a show that i had
supposedly knowin nobody paid jaz like ass
im gettin ahead of myself by the way i could rap
that came second to me movin this crack
give me a second i swear i would say about my rap career
til ninetysix came niggaz im here goodbye
talking
shawn used to be in the kitchen beating on the table and
rapping
and umm into the wee hours of the morning
and then i brought him a boombox
and his sisters and brothers said that he would drive them nuts
but that was my way to keep him close to me and out of trouble
goodbye to the game all the spoils the adrenaline rush
your blood boils you in a spot knowin cops could rush
at you in the drop you so easy to touch
no two days are alike except the 1st and 15th pretty much
and trust is a word you seldom hear from us
hustlers we dont sleep we rest one eye up
and a drought could define a man when the well dries up
you learn the worth of water
without work you thirst til you die yup
and niggaz get tied up for product
and little brothers ring fingers get cut up
to show mothers they really got em
and this is the stress i lived with
til i decided to try this rap shit for a livin
i pray im forgiven for every bad decision i made
every sister i played cause im still paranoid to this day
and its nobody fault i made the decisions ive made
this is the life i chose or rather the life that chose me
if you cant respect that your whole perspective is whack
maybe youll love me when i fade to black
if you cant respect that your whole perspective is whack
maybe youll love me when i fade to black
now if you cant respect that your whole perspective is whack
maybe youll love me when i fade to black
if you cant respect that your whole perspective is whack
maybe youll love me when i fade to black fading out
