frank zappa
warren cucurullo
denny walley
ike willis lead vocals
peter wolf
tommy mars
arthur barrow
ed mann
vinnie colaiuta
jeff
marginal chagrin
stumuk bass saxophone
dale bozzio
al malkin
craig steward
backstage at the local armory mary in her little white dress
is wiping the remnants of her performance off the side of her
mouth as larry zips up the front of his stinking boiler
suit and sings to the same teen-age girls who were stomping and
clapping a little while ago as they kneel with their little
pink mou
pen near the crew bus hoping to save the price of admission by
performing acts of hooverism on the jolly lads who set up the
pa system
larry
hey hey hey all you girls in these
industrial towns
i know youre probly gettin tired
of all the local clowns
they never give you no respect
they never treat you nice
so perhaps you oughta try
a little friendly advice
and be a crew slut
hey youll love it
be a crew slut
its a way of life
be a crew slut
see the world
dont make a fuss just get on the bus
crew slut
add water makes its own sauce
be a crew slut
so you dont forget call before midnite tonite
the boys in the crew
are just waiting for you
you never to get move around
you never go nowhere
i know yer probly gettin tired
of all the guys out there
you always wondered what its like
to go from place to place
so darlin take a little ride
on the mixers face
be a crew slut
just follow the magic footprints
be a crew slut
hey youll love it
be a crew slut
its a way of life
i aint gonna squash it
and you dont need to wash it
crew slut
hey ill buy you a pizza
crew slut
of course ill introduce you to warren
the boys in the crew
are only waiting for you
at this point the road crew as all road crews must from time
to time borrow some of the big rock groups equipment and have
a blues jam session indicating to the kneeling maidens that
they a
dowed with a great deal of raw talent as well as massive meat
obviously impressed with larrys ability to suck so hard on his
harmonica that screeching little noises come out of it mary
kneel
in and reaches upward in gestures of supplication listening
intently as larry continues to sing
larry
well you been to alabama girl
n georgia too
n all the boys in the crew
is bein good to you
i know yer sayin to yourself
this is the way to go
cause when you need a little extra
they will give you some mo
`cause youre the crew slut
mary
eh hah ha im into leather
larry
thats good a lot of the boys in the crew love leather
mary
and rubber
larry
yeh they like rubber tooshrink-tubing
with a hair dryer
road crew chorus
trade your spot on the bench
for a guy with a wrench
and be a
mary
ha ha ha
larry
you like that huh
i told you youd love it
its a way of life
road crew chorus
the guys in the crew
have got a present for you
ren nah naaah
ren nah naaah
ren nah naaah
mary
a present for me
road crew chorus
ren nah naaah
ren nah naaah
ren nah naaah
larry
hmmm we got a present for you
road crew chorus
ren nah naaah
ren nah naaah
ren nah naaah
mary
whaddya got
road crew chorus
ren nah naaah
mary
whaddya gonna give me
road crew chorus
ren nah naaah
ren nah naaah
larry
it looks just like a telefunken u-47
youll love it
mary
with leather
central scrutinizer
eh errr eh ehthis iseh the central scrutinizer again
and so mary was enticed away from joe
by an evil barbarian with a wrench in his pocket
lured into a life of sleazery
with the entire road crew of some
famous rock group
again we see
music
causing
big trouble